Have you ever been somewhere that you shouldn’t have been? Most of the time the outcome isn’t so hot, but this time was different. On this day, I wasn’t supposed to be at work, wasn’t supposed to be seeing patients. Didn’t even have my “doctor” clothes on. But there I was.
Her mom was concerned she might have a ringworm. I took a quick glance at the petite 4 year old’s forearm and confirmed that, quickly explaining to the mom how to treat it effectively. It should have been time to leave the room. But for whatever reason, I stayed. The mom looked older than me (at least in my mind 
), but it turned out she was a couple of years younger. She had 6 kids – the first was born when she was only a kid herself. They had been in foster care for several years, but were now back with her, and soon DHS would sign off on her as a mom.
At that point in the conversation, perhaps a normal person with manners and social grace would have just stopped – congratulated her and bowed out of the conversation. But I couldn’t help myself. I was compelled to know the whole story - to know HER. She had been on drugs – painkillers, then marijuana, and finally methamphetamine. The guys she hung out with were mean, but they supplied her drug habit. Eventually it caught up with her and the kids were picked up. She was devastated, but she was also addicted. For two more years she was unsuccessful in her struggle against it. Then she began to break free. Went through rehab – ALL the way through. Then a half-way house. Then outpatient counseling. Then she found a job. Then she got an apartment. Then she got her kids back.
What? How did that happen? The story doesn’t usually have a happy ending? What is your secret?
My parents believed in me. My friend believed in me. My counselor believed in me. My new boss believed in me.
When we begin to see people for who they were created to be, instead of who they are on the surface, it is easier to believe in them. And when WE believe in them, it is easier for them to begin to believe in themselves. I want to believe in people. In their potential. In the possibilities of their lives. In the awareness that a bad decision is not the same thing as a bad person. In the knowledge that we all make mistakes and none of us is perfect. In the hope that the future can be different than the past.
“You are an overcomer!” I said. Her eyes met mine, and she smiled. And on the day when I wasn’t supposed to be there, I was blessed enough to witness something miraculous – a family together again. Hope rising from ashes. Sure glad I went by the office.
I am encouraged!!! Thank you so much for sharing. I must tell you, that in my work as a speech-pathologist in early intervention, I work with kids in the foster care system, many who are on a path of being reconciled with their parent(s). Since reading this and other blogs, I am now committed to working just as hard to encourage those parents as I work to help their children and foster parents. Thank you.
Thank you for your insight. In my job (permancy planning) it is hard to keep your heart open to others and stay positive about their future. I have found that if we don’t belive in them it is hard for them to belive in themselves. I think they need to see your positive attitude to have one about themselves. You help give it to me.
I am glad the story is encouraging to you – I know it certainly was to me! I think of that mom and her family often, and it helps me get through those days when no one seems to be doing very well.